Day 17: Ashaiman SHS

This morning was chaotic. We arrived to the school early, as requested, to begin our morning assembly. Since today is the last day, they wanted us to end early because they had planned a recognition ceremony for us in the afternoon!  Well, as usual, we hurried up to wait. Headmaster was in a meeting but needed to meet with us before assembly. Finally, about an hour later he was able to see us. Basically he just wanted to welcome us for our final day and tell us of the ceremony they had planned for later. He also wanted to be sure we would finish our work by lunch. This did not fit with what I had scheduled for the day – I wanted to meet with the peer consulate group again and we had more one-on-one counseling sessions. However, the Headmaster calls the shots so we adjusted. I was disappointed because I did not get a chance to meet with the group again and I had promised them we would discuss some of their questions and concerns today. I had planned on helping them to identify the mission, goals, and purpose of their group along with providing basic mediation skills. I will give the information and training manual to the counselor and hope it reaches the students properly. ::sigh::

The wrap-up theme for the week was “Exploring Options - Post secondary options.” Two of our co-workers who are Ghanaian led this section since they know more about the educational system here than do we. They provided information on university and other college options as well as military options. As is usually the case with seminars like this – some students were extremely engaged, taking notes, and asking questions while others were passing notes, reading other material, or flat out sleeping. Teenagers are so similar, no matter their background or placement on this globe.

In the afternoon was the special ceremony recognizing our work this week and seeing off the student teachers. I did not want such an elaborate honoring for us. It almost felt as if we were stealing the thunder from the student teachers because we were the “Special friends from the U.S.” I definitely appreciate the gratitude; it just felt awkward. One of my friends told me not to worry; he told me that “this is how we show our thanks in Ghana.” There is a belief that if you do not appropriately thank or honor someone who has helped you that you will not again receive help (sounds religious or spiritual to me). At any rate, it was a really sweet gesture and we very much appreciated it.

This event was complete with drinks and appetizers, including the casual octopus kebab.  Not only were we honored and thanked publically, but we were each given gifts. We each received a large, framed “Citation.” A Citation is equivalent to a certificate in the States. The Citation reads:
“You arrived in Ghana-West Africa on 26th May, 2009 and first visited Ashaiman Senior High School on Monday, 1st June, 2009 to acquaint yourself with the environment and to put yourself in good shape of the task ahead. Subsequently, from Monday, 8th June to Friday, 12th June 2009, you together with other members of your three-member team took turns to share with the staff and students of the above-mentioned school your rich experiences in the field for social work particularly on issues concerning: “Expressing Myself,” “Positive Self-Talk,” “Leadership Heroes”, Goal Setting” ‘SMART’, and “Future Planning.” You also held daily counseling sessions with individual students who needed help. You also proved yourself a good mixer and exuded the spirit of voluntarism and selflessness. Lesson learned from your one week interaction with the ASHAISEC community will go down memory lane, especially for being the 1st Batch of Americans to willingly choose ASHAISEC for such an exercise. Thus for the above achievement and others which are yet to manifest; and selfless services to humanity, the Board of Governors, Parent-Teacher Association, Headmaster, Staff, and Students of Ashaiman Senior High School present to you this citation. Thank you. God richly Bless You.”

This, alone, brought tears to my eyes. I feel what we did was so simple and non-impactful, and to receive such a heartfelt recognition and token of appreciation really moved me. In the States you would never get such a large thank you for such a small task. I really love that about this culture – the people are soooo warm and loving and friendly. They are so genuinely interested in you, as a person, as a part of humanity. I have been incredibly well received in ways I would have never expected. I love the warmth I am surrounded by here. It makes my heart ache, truly.

Along with our Citation, we each received a wrapped gift which I was told included “something African for you to wear.” When I got home and opened the gift, it was a traditional dress complete with headscarf. I tried it on and I think I look a bit silly but it was incredibly thoughtful. I am not sure where I will wear this in the States, but I will definitely sport my super ab-fab new wear proudly. I really am so appreciative, it is beyond words. I had already cried when I said goodbye to the kids and several of them told me they didn’t want me to leave, they would miss me, and I had changed their lives. And then to be so positively received by the administration was mind bending. I wish schools in the States would be so appreciative of support services. I wish.
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Feeling like a ball of emotional turmoil (from a week well-done, mixed feelings of sadness, excitement, pride, and guilt) I did what most people do on Fridays at 5PM – I had an ice cold beer. I sat outside and talked with some of my Ghanaian friends. One of my friends, Gl., asked why American men have hair under their arms. I explained to her that in the US this is seen as “manly” and that hardly no men shave their underarms. She seemed appalled – “but what about the odor” she exclaimed? I asked about women and what the shave. Gi quickly chimed in “we do not shave our legs, but we shave everything else. Yes, everything.” She is usually such a soft spoken, modest, demure type of woman so I burst out laughing with her description, which included a proper hand motion demonstrating where “everything” was located. So, we had a cross cultural discussion about hair, cultural standards of beauty, and masculinity and femininity. It was really interesting to think about. Most of the arguments I have been making for or against shaving and hair is that it should be practical. Underarm hair catches sweat and increases odor – maybe shaving that is practical. Similarly for pubic hair. Leg hair, on the other hand?! What does it disturb, on a woman, other than her perceived beauty by the hegemonic society? Does my leg hair or lack there of really matter to anyone other than myself? It is not, inherently, “gross,” “disgusting,” or “wrong.” And, I argue how much of shaving legs is really a “preference.” We all have been so forced into gendered roles and boxes that we rarely have an opportunity to question or explore. How can you prefer something if you have not experienced the other? That’s like saying I prefer corn when it’s the only vegetable I have ever hard. That’s not a preference, it’s a lack of options. Having been exploring and testing gendered roles and boundaries for quite some time now, I found it reinforcing to have this conversation with two beautiful women and two beautiful men. :)